Day 7 – Wasted Energies

I think I’m on the road to recovery. It’s hard to tell for sure. Objectively, my temperature remains normal, the cough is largely gone, and this morning’s test took a few more seconds to scream UNCLEAN than it did at the weekend. Energy levels are still in my boots, however, and I wasn’t able to work a full day.

A hallmark of the last year has been the constant anxiety that I had Covid without realising, and could be infecting people accidentally. Every slight feeling of warmth had me reaching for the thermometer. Every bout of tiredness became a compromised immune system. During the handful of social events I’d maintain my distance, watch what I touched, worry constantly. Never let my guard down.

Now I know how Covid actually manifests in me, I can’t help but regret the vast reserves of mental energy I poured away for no good reason. I know it’s good to be responsible, but I turned into a fret monster.

Will this experience make my anxiety better or worse?

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